While you can

Happy Saturday everyone,

The weekend is here, yippee… it’s going to be an amazing weekend. Chili is made and now to make the cornbread after I finish writing the blog. Oh, just in case you’re wondering, I am co-chair for the chili cook-off for the Woman’s Club here in the lake, and since John hasn’t been feeling totally 100%, I made the chili for his entry. Should be a fun event and I’m so grateful that my niece will be here to support my first official duty in the Club. What are your plans for the weekend? Shoot me a text or leave me a comment, I’d love to hear from you.

I heard this song a few weeks back and it really made me stop and think about life and how precious it is. I’ve found myself traveling back in my memories for the times I shared with my dad, for some of the amazing conversations I’ve had with my brothers, and I struggle sometimes with the distance between us. Growing up I always wanted a big family, so when I married into one, I thought it was the best thing ever, except, we lived so far away, it made it difficult to get super close. When I finally found my dad, I inherited two younger brothers I had no clue existed and I was able to find my big brothers, which was amazing. I went from an only child to having five brothers and a sister.

Life though has different plans for the way I thought things should go. I dreamed of family reunions, Christmas together, but they have their own lives and I have mine. We aren’t kids anymore, and our lives, though connected, are on different paths, and that’s okay.

‘Til you can’t’ by Cody Johnson, made me realize just how precious the little moments matter. I love the time I get with all my brothers on the phone. I hope soon to be able to take a road trip and visit them all. I think a road trip will be a good thing for my mind and creativity for writing. Soon. Soon I’ll take that trip I’ve always dreamed of. Who knows, maybe I’ll find a way to get the jeep I found. Going to look at it tomorrow. I’m told if you believe it, it will happen. I’m imagining my bank account suddenly has an extra five grand in it to make it possible and if it doesn’t, that’s okay too, it’s just not the path the Universe wants me on at this time.

One thing I’ve struggled with since my dad passed away was not taking the time to make the phone call to him the day before he died. I wonder if I would have talked to him if I would have heard it in his voice that his time was imminent and maybe I could have gone to see him. I think I’ve shared this before with you, but just in case, I’ll share really quick what had happened. It was Monday and I called dad, and he didn’t have much time to talk, he sounded really good, but I knew he was sick, I just didn’t realize how close it was for him to go. I told him I’d call him back the next day, but I got too busy to make that call, then Wednesday came along and again, I was busy and said the next day for sure. Well, on Wednesday evening, while cooking dinner, I got a phone call from my brother Jimmy, “dad’s gone.” Our dad closed his eyes and went to sleep. I was numb and I felt an overwhelming sense of guilt. I never got to say goodbye.

I’ve come to realize though; I had many moments with my dad, ones I’ll cherish forever, and it was his time for him to say goodbye. I can’t go back and change his dying, however, when this song came up, those feelings of guilt revisited me and what I want to share with you all is this, while you can, while the moments are possible, use those opportunities to make sure you never feel regrets.

“You can tell your old man you’ll do some largemouth fishing another time, you just got too much on your plate to bait and cast a line, you can always put a rain check in his hand, ’til you can’t’. You can keep putting off forever with that girl whose heart you hold, swearing that you’ll ask some day further down the road, you can always put a diamond on her hand, ’til you can’t.’ Don’t take too long to do the things you’ve dreamed of. Don’t waste time, it’s too precious.

“If you got a chance, take it, take it while you got a chance. If you got a dream, chase it, cause a dream won’t chase you back. If you’re gonna love somebody, hold ’em as long and as strong and as close as you can. ‘Til you can’t.

Those ’til you can’t’ moments come so fast, faster than we expect them too. As I write this, I think about the dreams I have, the one I love, and I hope I’m not wasting time. I will forever cherish what my Aunt Billie has told me for as long as I can remember, “live with little to no regrets.” It’s in moments like today, as I write this blog, I want to run. I want to feel the wind on my face, the breeze in my hair and I want to live in these moments that I worked so hard for. I think sometimes I get too comfortable, and I forget to appreciate the little moments. I want to make sure I remember how I had it all, lost everything and I’m now, I’m slowly getting things back, maybe not everything, but the important things.

“There’s a box of greasy parts sitting in the trunk of that ’65, still waiting on you and your granddad to bring it back to life. You can always get around to fixing up that Pontiac, ’til you can’t.'” This makes me think about all the to do’s I have around my home and the last few days, being here alone, I’ve taken the time to stay up most of the night, getting up early and getting things done and it feels good to find myself again in the passions that I buried for so long. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I hate not having John here, yet, I understand, he still needs the time to get himself back to his best self. The body doesn’t heal overnight, it takes time. He still needs his rest.

“If you got a chance, take it, take it while you got a chance.” Regrets are a horrible thing to live with and rid yourself of. Life is about living, not dying. It’s about the journey, not the destination. Do the things that bring you joy and happiness. Fall in love, dance in the rain, make love as often as you can, live your dream, ’til you can’t.’

This morning when I went for my walk with Molly, I saw a U-Haul at my neighbor’s home. She’s 87 years old and she’s the one I told you about, the one who looks amazing and could be a model. It looks like she’s going to the place where she won’t be alone anymore and to the place that can help her as her mind leaves her body before her body is ready to say goodbye to this world. I hope as she drives away with her daughter, she is filled with nothing but happy memories of her time here in the lake. I hope she still remembers the little moments that made her happy.

“So, take that phone call from your momma and just talk, ’cause you’ll never know how bad you wanna ’til you can’t someday. Don’t wait on tomorrow, ’cause tomorrow may not show, say your sorry’s, your I-love-you’s, ’cause man, you never know. If you got a chance, take it, take it while you got a chance. If you’re gonna love somebody, hold ’em as long and as strong and as close as you can, until you can’t,’ til you can’t’, yeah, take it.”

Now my dear readers, take time to reflect on the things you want to do now, ’til you can’t.’ I hope you fall in love, laugh, dream, and live your best life possible. No regrets. When it comes time to fall asleep and move on from this life, go with a sense of I lived life, I loved life, and I loved those in my life. Go make that phone call today to that one person you need to talk to, and you keep putting it off and if a phone call doesn’t work today, shoot them a text and let them know, you love them.

I do hope you enjoyed the reading today and I pray today is a wonderful one for you and those you love. Until next time, don’t forget, Love Life++

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